Help us out with this Cockney translation

Here at CockneyRhymingSlang.co.uk we do like to help people out who are baffled by the Cockney lingo. This week a student from Poland has written to us asking for help translating the video below for his English lessons (the things they use for teaching these days). Well we think this ad is a wee bit fake, but let’s try and translate it anyway. Here’s the ad:

And here’s our translation SO FAR:

“Wotcher me old China Plate. Here I am doin’ a bit of graft in the States.

But what a culture shock I ‘ad with the old Nosebag!

How can ya ‘ave your elevens wifaht a nice cuppa Rosy Lee?

And I was in a right Two and Eight wif me afters as well. No pudding, no custard, no scones, no clotted cream …

What a choker!

But I’ve ‘ad a right result. I’ve sussed it out. ‘ere, come ‘ere.

If you and the old Trouble and Strife (?) with your grub do yourself a favour, click on ukgoods.com.

They’ve got (?) of all your British favourites.”

There’s just a few bits left to get. Can anyone help?

Comments

comments


4 responses to “Help us out with this Cockney translation”

  1. Dominic Adams says:

    "Wotcher me old China Plate. Here I am doin’ a bit of graft in the States, but what a culture shock I ‘ad with the old nosebag!
    ‘Ow can ya ‘ave your elevenses wifaht a nice cup ‘o’ Rosy Lee?
    And I was in a right two and eight wiv me afters as well. No pudding, no custard, no scones, no clotted cream …What a choker!
    But I’ve ‘ad a right result. I’ve sussed it out. ‘ere, come ‘ere.
    If you and the old trouble and strife are ‘avin [red]ag(gravation)[/red] with your grub do yourself a favour, click on ukgoods.com.
    They’ve got [red]cotchells[/red] of all your British favourites."

  2. Dominic Adams says:

    And it [i]is[/i] fake…

  3. Admin says:

    Excellent, well done Dominic Adams for the complete translation.

    This word "cotchell", that’s hard to spell. Found a definition for it as follows:

    "COTCHEL, an odd lot of anything; a collection or bundle of odd material, such as sticks for fire-lighting, odd meal, straw, etc. TO COTCHEL, or CODGEL UP, to put roughly together, or, "anyhow." "His grammer codgelled up an ol’ pat-ball for ‘im."

  4. pat says:

    Hello my friend, Im here working in the States, but have had a bit of a culture shock regarding the food.
    How can one have a midmorning break without a nice cup of tea?
    I was stressed out about dessert too! No pudding,custard, scones or clotted cream. What a disappointment!
    Its great now tho as Ive figured it out and have a great solution.
    If you and your wife are having stress about the food you can help yourselves out by clicking on ukgoods.com they’ve got oodles of all your British favourites.( I was right chuffed doin that)